you killed me, my love.

photo credit: google :)

Lariannya semakin perlahan. Nafas Azly semakin memberat. Kotak hadiah ditangan hampir terlepas dari pegangan, namun sempat dipeluk erat. Kotak bersazi sederhana itu tidak dibalut dengan kertas pembalut hadiah. Tanpa ada sebarang titipan nota ucapan mahupun reben merah dibahagian tepi kotak.

Langkah kakinya mati saat tiba di seleksi buku-buku sastera terbitan DBP. Namun kelibat orang yang dicarinya tiada. Tiba-tiba dia terdengar suara ketawa kecil perempuan yang diselang seli dengan suara garau lelaki tidak dikenali. Tiba dihadapan mereka berdua, Azly tersenyum kelat. Perempuan itu tersipu-sipu malu dan lelaki yg tidak dikenalinya itu pura-pura menyambung bacaan buku tulisan Pak Sako.

“maaf lambat beri hadiah harijadi, saya nak pastikan hadiah yang saya bagi ni istimewa dan tak boleh jumpa di mana-mana. Saya harap awak akan kenang sampai bila-bila”

“kenapa awak pucat sangat ni Azly?” Tanya Dhira.

“Nah, untuk awak. Selamat ulangtahun kelahiran. Selamat tinggal and happy reading, sayang” ujar Azly lantas berlalu pergi.

Dhira terpinga-pinga namun seakan sudah dapat mengagak akan ahdiah yg diterimanya. Azly sering kali menghadiahkan buku-buku sastera DBP dan ITMB kepadanya.  Sudah banyak koleksi kumpulan cerpen yang diterima dari Azly.

Kotak yang diterimanya sebentar tadi dibuka perlahan.  Seketul jantung yang masih berdenyut diatas sebuah buku itu yang terlihat membuatkan Dhira menjerit tidak keruan.  Dhira lari bertempiaran dan keluar dari perpustakaan awam, histeria dan tidak terkawal. 

Tajuk akhbar media arus perdana memaparkan kisah seorang wanita maut dilanggar lori. Dua ketul jantung yang dipercayai milik mangsa dan seoarng lelaki ditemui disebelah jasad wanita itu, masih berdenyut. 

rezeki.

Alhamdulillah, thank you ALLAH ;)
sebab makbulkan dua doa yang paling sering aku sebut sepanjang Ramadhan tempoh hari.

Salah satunya adalah, doaku untuk mendapatkan kerja di tempat baru.
rasa macam woohoooo !

Alhamdulillah, thank you ALLAH, for this rezeki (and more to come!)

raya unzipped

So this morning I was so lazy nak bangkit pi mandi malasnya Tuhan je yang tahu sebab mengantuk sebab semalam lama gila dalam bas Karak highway jammed merangkak !

Lepas mandi tidoq balik sat pastu gegeh bangun nk sesiap, nasib baik nampak my fav baju kurung dah siap iron. Ok pakai ni jelah malas aku nk melawa di pagi Isnin yg penuh kebiruan (Monday Blues). This baju kurung was my baju during my convo few years back. Still 'in' dia punya design and I love it sebab no need to iron teruk-teruk.

Alhamdulillah my singlet all went missing waktu balik kampung ahahaha, kenapa aku say Alhamdulillah sebab hati tergerak nk pakai inner, not singlet. Because something embarrassing happened to me this morning.

Aku unzipped baju kurung bila nak pakai, zip kat belakang. Pastu HOW ON EARTH AKU LUPA NK ZIP BALIK BAJU AKU WOIIIII ????

YA TUHAN, dah sampai opis aku pi tandas baru aku noticed. Taktau nk kabo malu ke sedih T___T . No wonder lah aku rasa baju menggelebeh semacam, tangan panjang serabut perut aih. Nasib baiklah zip yg terbukak tu idak le besar sgt sampai ke blkg pinggang. Cuma few cm melepasi bahu, Alhamdulillah. Thank you ALLAH sbb gerakkan hati aku nk pakai inner today, bukan singlet. Phewwww! aurat babe, aurat tuuuuuuu.

Nampak sangat dah kena kawin aku ni, Kalau ada husband boleh gak tolong zip kan baju kt belakang tu. Kahkahkah.

Alhamdulillah again.

rasa rindu yang menggunung itu pun terbunuh,
kerana sikap egois kamu.




ok, aku juga.

would you date an avid reader?

My fav book with fav drink; neslo suam ;) 

“You should date a girl who reads.
Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes, who has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she has found the book she wants. You see that weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a secondhand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow and worn.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas, for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry and in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who read understand that all things must come to end, but that you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes.”

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I didn't ask you to date me. I'm just sharing this quote as I found it on Goodreads. Too nice to hold it from being shared !

offense'

you'll be sorry for that.